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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2727 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 240When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
4.14 Roundhouse Kicks (418 votes)Rate it:12345

# 567Chuck Norris scored 16 million on the SAT's without ever reading the test booklet.
3.41 Roundhouse Kicks (307 votes)Rate it:12345

# 26Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (1127 votes)Rate it:12345

# 65The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
4.08 Roundhouse Kicks (714 votes)Rate it:12345

# 322Chuck Norris' muscle are so big that everywhere you look you see them.
1.94 Roundhouse Kicks (392 votes)Rate it:12345

# 479All life on earth is carbon-based, with one exception: Chuck Norris. His organic structure is based on Norrisilium, an element found only within Chuck Norris. Norrisilium has an atomic weight of 156, and is believed to be formed when two platinum atoms are spin-kicked together in the presence of a beard catalyst.
3.53 Roundhouse Kicks (288 votes)Rate it:12345

# 175Once, between scenes on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, an actor asked Chuck, "Why do you always deliver roundhouse kicks to the bad guys? Why donít you mix it up?" Norris bit his lip and replied, "Good idea." Bad idea. After shooting, Chuck asked the man to meet him in the alley behind the studio. Here, Chuck roundhouse kicked the man 37 times in the face, all the while saying, "What now, bitch?"
2.94 Roundhouse Kicks (449 votes)Rate it:12345

# 658Chuck Norris craps bigger than you, literally, it is bigger than you.
2.97 Roundhouse Kicks (326 votes)Rate it:12345

# 267Each nuclear bomb on Earth it the result of a canned Roundhouse kick.
2.77 Roundhouse Kicks (293 votes)Rate it:12345

# 183When Chuck Norris was born, he had already had sex, three times.
3.74 Roundhouse Kicks (452 votes)Rate it:12345

# 2387Chuck Norris can roll a 10 on a six sidded die.
4.03 Roundhouse Kicks (1582 votes)Rate it:12345

# 227Chuck Norris refuses to have sex with anyone uglier than himself. Consequently, this means he must masturbate in front of a mirror.
3.43 Roundhouse Kicks (405 votes)Rate it:12345

# 199Jimmy Hendrix did not die of a drug overdose. He happened to walk into the empty bar Chuck Norris was playing guitar at and promptly died.
3.04 Roundhouse Kicks (342 votes)Rate it:12345

# 57For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
4.16 Roundhouse Kicks (992 votes)Rate it:12345

# 602The police never looked for Tupac or Biggie's murderers because they knew it was Chuk Norris.
3.21 Roundhouse Kicks (306 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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