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Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.35 Roundhouse Kicks (2036 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.28 Roundhouse Kicks (3279 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.26 Roundhouse Kicks (4253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2346 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.24 Roundhouse Kicks (3198 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.23 Roundhouse Kicks (1641 votes)Rate it:12345

# 196Mr. A once claimed that he's tougher than Chuck Norris. Upon hearing about this, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him so hard he flew 19 letters back in the alphabet, becoming Mr. T. Chuck Norris does not pity the fool.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1461 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (1776 votes)Rate it:12345

# 536Scientists created Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Vin Diesel, and Hulk Hogan by using urine samples from a toilet Chuck Norris once pissed in.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (620 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (2727 votes)Rate it:12345

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15 Random Facts: (more)
# 304Chuck Norris once visited China. This is why they have slanty eyes.
3.08 Roundhouse Kicks (405 votes)Rate it:12345

# 434In Soviet Russia Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you.
2.31 Roundhouse Kicks (323 votes)Rate it:12345

# 443Chuck Norris doesn't need coffee to wake up in the morning. Coffee needs Chuck Norris.
3.77 Roundhouse Kicks (334 votes)Rate it:12345

# 347Chuck Norris can rip Gorillas in half with his eyelids.
3.44 Roundhouse Kicks (361 votes)Rate it:12345

# 263Everyone has a little bit of Chuck Norris in them. Mainly due to rape.
3.64 Roundhouse Kicks (450 votes)Rate it:12345

# 86There are super-advanced aliens ready to invade earth, they are waiting until Chuck Norris dies. They are not aware that Chuck Norris can not die.
4.1 Roundhouse Kicks (681 votes)Rate it:12345

# 514Trevette wasn't naturally black... He's bruised all over his body by Chuck Norris.
3.49 Roundhouse Kicks (253 votes)Rate it:12345

# 165Chuck Norris is so tough that he blows bubbles with beef jerkey.
4.11 Roundhouse Kicks (664 votes)Rate it:12345

# 127Chuck Norris eats grapefruit on Tuesdays.
2.07 Roundhouse Kicks (575 votes)Rate it:12345

# 282The Titanic movie was supposed to have a happy ending. However when Chuck Norris learned he had been beaten out for the starring role by Leonardo DiCaprio, he went back in time and roundhouse kicked a huge hole in the ship.
3.64 Roundhouse Kicks (348 votes)Rate it:12345

# 348Chuck Norris puts the Kill in Skill.
3.73 Roundhouse Kicks (367 votes)Rate it:12345

# 242Chuck Norris once smuggled drugs across the border. But it was hardly smuggling at all since he just picked up over 400 pounds of drugs and walked into the US. The border patrol would have stopped him but he was just too tough.
2.32 Roundhouse Kicks (356 votes)Rate it:12345

# 222Chuck Norris' Cunnilingus is equal to a 9.4 on the Richter scale.
3.25 Roundhouse Kicks (335 votes)Rate it:12345

# 379Chuck Norris recently overtook heart disease as the leading cause of death in the US.
3.86 Roundhouse Kicks (345 votes)Rate it:12345

# 525We are a figment of Chuck Norris's imagination.
3.52 Roundhouse Kicks (343 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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