Chuck Norris is God

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Top 10 Facts:
# 100A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
4.53 Roundhouse Kicks (1432 votes)Rate it:12345

# 1Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. But he is so badass, he has never cried. Ever.
4.29 Roundhouse Kicks (3759 votes)Rate it:12345

# 83Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
4.25 Roundhouse Kicks (2781 votes)Rate it:12345

# 151Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
4.22 Roundhouse Kicks (1916 votes)Rate it:12345

# 105Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4.2 Roundhouse Kicks (2730 votes)Rate it:12345

# 178Chuck Norris lost his viginity before his dad did.
4.19 Roundhouse Kicks (1213 votes)Rate it:12345

# 24Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and knew karate.
4.18 Roundhouse Kicks (2473 votes)Rate it:12345

# 381In the Coke vs. Pepsi Challenge, Chuck Norris chose Sprite...and he was right.
4.18 Roundhouse Kicks (1390 votes)Rate it:12345

# 101Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (2356 votes)Rate it:12345

# 159Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
4.17 Roundhouse Kicks (1792 votes)Rate it:12345

15 Random Facts: (more)
# 260The civil war did not stop racism ... Chuck norris did.
3.54 Roundhouse Kicks (379 votes)Rate it:12345

# 914Chuck Norris once swallowed a quarter and shit out 2 dimes and a nickle
3.8 Roundhouse Kicks (851 votes)Rate it:12345

# 566The Chuck Norris constant is a number scientists and mathematicians have been searching for for many years, when applied to any equation, it fears for its life and solves itself.
3.61 Roundhouse Kicks (270 votes)Rate it:12345

# 171The sun doesn't shine on Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris shines on the sun.
3.47 Roundhouse Kicks (360 votes)Rate it:12345

# 441Windows will not lock up on Chuck Norris. Because Windows is afraid.
3.62 Roundhouse Kicks (308 votes)Rate it:12345

# 609Chuck Norris once took a crap and it kicked Jean Claude Van Damme's ass.
3.59 Roundhouse Kicks (317 votes)Rate it:12345

# 186Chuck Norris still hasn't gotten one Jeopardy question wrong. Jesus has missed two.
3.75 Roundhouse Kicks (436 votes)Rate it:12345

# 91After the Grinch stole Christmas, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the face and took it back. Then he roundhouse kicked every last orphan in whoville and kept it for himself.
3.69 Roundhouse Kicks (412 votes)Rate it:12345

# 270Michael Jackson's face is the result of a roundhouse kick delivered by Chuck Norris.
3.64 Roundhouse Kicks (359 votes)Rate it:12345

# 37Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
3.67 Roundhouse Kicks (495 votes)Rate it:12345

# 237Chuck Norris' favorite color is blood.
3.95 Roundhouse Kicks (419 votes)Rate it:12345

# 261It is rumoured that Chuck Norris once lost a bet at a racing track. No first hand witnesses have been found, and no one recalls any such incident. This was of course, to be expected...
2.85 Roundhouse Kicks (302 votes)Rate it:12345

# 13In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
4.13 Roundhouse Kicks (1570 votes)Rate it:12345

# 556When Chuck Norris plays God he always wins.
3.36 Roundhouse Kicks (302 votes)Rate it:12345

# 422Chuck Norris can unfuck a pregnant woman.
3.97 Roundhouse Kicks (456 votes)Rate it:12345

-- More Random Facts --

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